Management Pillars

Blame is an excellent skill to have; especially after a project fails. The project fell a little short because you have spent more time drinking than managing the project and it has ultimately failed and/or been delayed for weeks. In order to allow upper management realize that it was none of your wrongdoing, try the following:

• Always name names. Don’t ever use word like "they" or "my team", instead use the following - "John has a real problem with authority and actively refused participation in the project"
• Fire someone. This is a prime example of you doing your very best.
• Call out your employees on faults that may or may not have had during the duration of the project…. Lying goes a long way, and always makes you look better.
• Recommend a demotion to all members of your team, so that you can receive a bonus whenever the project gets completed.

Remember eat coal…shit diamonds.

Often employees will ask a question you do not wish to answer.  The best way to handle this is to:

• Lie
• Repeat the question then - talk about a long forgotten work issue
• Yell - about nothing in particular - ensure you use works like fuck, shit and we are fucked now
• Throw something…anything
• Tell the truth, then blame someone else then fire them
• Tell the employee you need more information
• Ask the employee who gave them permisson to approach you, then fire that person
• Never, and I mean never take responsibility for any actions you may or may not have done 

When your employee excels at their job, it is important not to let them know; in fact, you will want to make them feel as if they are doing the opposite. Without constant questioning, pestering, and an overall “I don’t trust you” attitude, you will never successfully pull this one off.

Phrases and tips that work, PERIOD:

•  ”Where are you on that?”
• “Is that all you have accomplished?”
• “Looks, OK…. but you have a long way to go”
• “Is it finished yet?”
• “Have you actually done anything today?”
• “Is this work related?”
• “Doesn’t sound productive to me”
• “Work Smarter”
• “Progress is slim”
• “You call this completed?”

Ensure you recreate the past no matter the cost or facts to boslter your position…truth and the american way have no room in the new age of leadership

Ensure you are always right…instill doubt to make co-workers tremble at the thought of confrontation

Might=Right 

Then out of nowhere use random explosive outbursts and accusations as the supreme fear mechanism.

Fear = Respect

One Up

It is important to let your subordinates know that whatever they have done, you have already outdone years ago
so when they come to you to gloat about their accomplishments, let them know how much you don’t give a shit, because you have already done it….. better

If your employees (subordinates is what we will call them from now on) do not fear you when you walk in the room, then there is something wrong.